WHO SAYS YA CAN'T MAKE A BUCK IN THE ARTS?
Another headline exclusive scoop. It's a doozy. Conspiracy expose of the decade. Government crimes against the Arts. Writers targeted. A whole generation of American youth has been literarily lobotomized. I think I see a cash payo—I mean, an opportunity.
Due to U.S. Federal malfeasance, whether it be shockingly stupid, delusional do-gooder policies, or twisted political motivations to keep the man down, illiterate Johnny (and Janey) cannot read. Education has failed our youth. And killed my audience.
I do alot of writing in my practice as a visual artist. I take this literary study very seriously. Great writers are not anointed; they simply worked harder.
The pain and suffering has been excruciating. In my line of study, there is a great deal of bleeding. Writing is not for the squeamish. I work very hard at my craft. Past the point of sheer exhaustion.
As I slaved in solitary silence, I dreamed of building an audience. Of smart and very attractive readers, of high wit, musical laughter, bold style, substantial net worth and generous hearts. I have been robbed of an audience for my work. By my own government.
Suddenly, my hopes and dreams of literary greatness, vanished. A whole generation of Americans have literally gone dark. (They now live only for the mystical light that dances from their hand held devices.)
We've laughed and chortled about this for a decade. But, lo, it has truly come to pass. No joke. Now Berkeley professors complain their uneducated collegiate youth really can't read. (Click Here.) And the screen-eyed can't comprehend a thought longer than a TikTok second. Evolutionary crisis, yes?
The Feds took away my whole raison d'etre. Why write? I now live for naught. Bereft and looking for meaning, I might even consider having children.
But No! The US Educational Complex retarded an entire generation of Americans. Children, for God's sake. Hitler-ian. Mengele-ian. Doktor Mabuse-ian. Diabolical. Cruel and unusual, yes?
And they're not out to get just me. It's you, and YOU, AND YOU!
No way around it. This is a righteous, class action holy crusade. Like the bold knights of yore. Hell, damages for my genius alone will be in the nine digits. Once the bandwagon gets rolling, the Blue Chippers will jump aboard. Text-based Ruscha, Holder and Kruger are gonna clean up. How many zeros does that bounty have now?
Who says you can't make a buck in the Arts? Authors, call the number at the bottom of the screen, and let's class our action!
EPILOGUE: And by the way, you know this will get really ugly when the illiterate sue. Since they can't read, they have been slow to jump on the class action bandwagon. A whole generation will be looking for a fast settlement buck. The government trough is open.
The illiterate are righteously angry at their stupefaction and forced deprivation, of enlightenment, reason, and culture, all benefits of the written word.
The Ilit-tards, as they proudly call their new political party, have instead made illiteracy fashionable.
Isn't it funny when a doggie chases his tail? History repeats. As it so happens, writers are out, and visual artists are in high demand now. Fees are higher than a Silicon Valley escort. Illustrators are needed to draw the images that tell an entertaining story without words to the Ilit-tards. The trend has created a visual arts renaissance. Life is funny like that.
Art Report Today .com
